And they nearly always make me laugh.
So, in that spirit, here are some funny quotes of kids of some friends of mine, from here & here & here & here & here. If your kids are saying funny things - or any kids you know - please add in the comments. And have a great day!
"What's your favorite attitude?" (this is a game she plays with the boys- shines a light on them and asks this. I have no idea where it came from)
"You have to read the destructions first to know what to do."
"It breaked my ears when you yelled. And you breaked my feelings."
"My legs hurt because I eated too much pancakes. I don't want these legs anymore- I need new ones."
"What's inside these grapes? Apple juice?"
"Off to see the lizard, the wonder-bull lizard da boz!"
"I need to take it to Blocks-Mustard (Blockbuster)"
"Shun-shine's in my eyes. . . I want Momma turn it off!"
C: (singing the theme song from Joy School) Oh, boy, I've got Joy. I do, I do. It starts in my heart ... Hey, momma, do you have joy in your heart?
M: Yes, I do, because of you. I have joy in my heart 'cause I love you so much. Do you have joy in your heart, Cam?
C: No ... but I have big muscles.
Mom: Madeline are you going to keep your blue eyes?
Madeline: No, I want pink eyes!
Calvin: I'm thirsty...
R: "Oh good, I want the police to take me"
Me: "They would not take you, they would take me and give you to someone else to take care of you...wouldn't that be sad?"
R: "not if the new people do not follow satan's plan, if they follow Jesus it will be OK"
Me: "What if the new family does not believe in Jesus?"
R: "I would just run away and find someone who follows Jesus."
Me; "Wouldn't you miss me?"
R: "Oh yeah, but you will be out in about 5 years or 75 months or something like that...."
Mom: Madeline are you going to keep your blue eyes?
Madeline: No, I want pink eyes!
Calvin: I'm thirsty...
Dad: We'll get a drink when we get home.
Calvin: I need a drink.
Dad: You'll be fine...you can wait.
Calvin: But I don't like tongue juice!
Dad: What are you talking about?
Calvin: The water that my tongue makes in my mouth, I don't like it, I want real water.
Dad: Yeah, we'll get some when we get home.
This morning Ryland did not want to wear his jacket to school, so I told him that if I did not have him dress properly that the school would call the police.Anna Elise: Mom look at that hairy mountain with trees all over it!
Outside our duplex while Mike is working on the porch, Calvin (handing Mike a filthy and torn glove): Dad, here's a glove so you won't get your hand dirty.
Dad: Where did you get that?
Calvin: I found it over there in the mud for you!
Calvin (while going to bed): Are there dinosaurs in my closet waiting to get me?
Dad: No, there aren't anymore dinosaurs, they all died a long time ago.
Calvin: But if they are resurrected they could get me...Dad, will dinosaurs be resurrected?
Yesterday evening we had dinner with our friends the Becks at their pool. As we were leaving Lucy (4) said most beguilingly, "Good night, Oliver. I am going to dream about YOU tonight!" Oliver looked at her and replied frankly. "Good night, Lucy. I am going to dream about trains and race cars."
As I was tucking Oliver into bed tonight I pulled the covers up around his dear little shoulders and whispered, "I have a secret...want to hear? I love YOU!" Ollie smiled sleepily and said, "I have a secrick, too." I put my head close to his and he whispered in my ear, "I want to play with Jayla after we go to Target and buy me a race car birthday cake." I had to laugh. That was not exactly what I was expecting to hear!
This morning Oliver and I were reading an Easter book his Grandma Halverson sent us this past spring. It said something to the effect of "Jesus taught the people many new things." Ollie's eyes lit up and he said, "Like running somersaults!?!"
Ryan is out of town so I was putting the kids to bed by myself tonight. Oliver was being really difficult. I told him to pick up his toys or he wouldn't get to read a book. He said, "You make me so ANGY!" I was about to lose it so I said, harshly "Actually, Ollie, YOU are making me angry." He replied. "You not making good choices, Mommy. You being naughty."
Remind us to warn the girls that the way to Sterling's (5) heart is through his stomach. After eating something delicious (I think a cup of grapefruit from Gpa's tree) he was telling Colton about it and said "and then I ate a mouthful of love."
Dacie was running around naked after leaking out of her diaper all over her crib while I cleaned...AND Sterling exclaimed super suprised, "OH MY, Dacie doesn't have a penis" (we use correct anatomy terminology around here) and then he thought for a minute and said," oh, that's all right--she will get one when she gets older." So you can fill in blanks to the rest of our conversation.
Ryland's conversations with us lately have been quite humorous! They have gone something like this:
Last night at FHE Ryland found my eyeglasses and put them on, then he came running out to me and said "look mom, do I look like a professional?" After I recovered from laughing I asked him, "do you even know what a professional is?"
R-"yes, it is a scien~tester (aka scientist)"
Me- "oh, a scientester - what are those?"
R-"you know, the bad ones make zombies and the good ones do experiments."
Outside our duplex while Mike is working on the porch, Calvin (handing Mike a filthy and torn glove): Dad, here's a glove so you won't get your hand dirty.
Dad: Where did you get that?
Calvin: I found it over there in the mud for you!
Calvin (while going to bed): Are there dinosaurs in my closet waiting to get me?
Dad: No, there aren't anymore dinosaurs, they all died a long time ago.
Calvin: But if they are resurrected they could get me...Dad, will dinosaurs be resurrected?
Yesterday evening we had dinner with our friends the Becks at their pool. As we were leaving Lucy (4) said most beguilingly, "Good night, Oliver. I am going to dream about YOU tonight!" Oliver looked at her and replied frankly. "Good night, Lucy. I am going to dream about trains and race cars."
As I was tucking Oliver into bed tonight I pulled the covers up around his dear little shoulders and whispered, "I have a secret...want to hear? I love YOU!" Ollie smiled sleepily and said, "I have a secrick, too." I put my head close to his and he whispered in my ear, "I want to play with Jayla after we go to Target and buy me a race car birthday cake." I had to laugh. That was not exactly what I was expecting to hear!
This morning Oliver and I were reading an Easter book his Grandma Halverson sent us this past spring. It said something to the effect of "Jesus taught the people many new things." Ollie's eyes lit up and he said, "Like running somersaults!?!"
Ryan is out of town so I was putting the kids to bed by myself tonight. Oliver was being really difficult. I told him to pick up his toys or he wouldn't get to read a book. He said, "You make me so ANGY!" I was about to lose it so I said, harshly "Actually, Ollie, YOU are making me angry." He replied. "You not making good choices, Mommy. You being naughty."
Remind us to warn the girls that the way to Sterling's (5) heart is through his stomach. After eating something delicious (I think a cup of grapefruit from Gpa's tree) he was telling Colton about it and said "and then I ate a mouthful of love."
Dacie was running around naked after leaking out of her diaper all over her crib while I cleaned...AND Sterling exclaimed super suprised, "OH MY, Dacie doesn't have a penis" (we use correct anatomy terminology around here) and then he thought for a minute and said," oh, that's all right--she will get one when she gets older." So you can fill in blanks to the rest of our conversation.
Ryland's conversations with us lately have been quite humorous! They have gone something like this:
Last night at FHE Ryland found my eyeglasses and put them on, then he came running out to me and said "look mom, do I look like a professional?" After I recovered from laughing I asked him, "do you even know what a professional is?"
R-"yes, it is a scien~tester (aka scientist)"
Me- "oh, a scientester - what are those?"
R-"you know, the bad ones make zombies and the good ones do experiments."
R: "Oh good, I want the police to take me"
Me: "They would not take you, they would take me and give you to someone else to take care of you...wouldn't that be sad?"
R: "not if the new people do not follow satan's plan, if they follow Jesus it will be OK"
Me: "What if the new family does not believe in Jesus?"
R: "I would just run away and find someone who follows Jesus."
Me; "Wouldn't you miss me?"
R: "Oh yeah, but you will be out in about 5 years or 75 months or something like that...."
